It seems the more worried I get, the sillier the songs get in my head. For the past two days, it's been "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix-a-Lot. It's quite difficult to make life altering decisions when "My A-na-con-da don't-want-none-unless-you-got-buns-hun" is playing over and over in your head.

So, gee, big surprise, I'm a bit of an emotional eater. The result; I've been noshing on Hersheys Chocolate Covered Almond Bites for the last two days. Honestly, I've been trying not to, but there so good. Okay, maybe just one more. Oh, damnit.

I think I'm going to make a shirt that says "I worked for United Way for Four Years and All I Got was This Stupid T-Shirt... And an Ulcer". Jeez. In the last 24 hours, I keep going back and forth on my decision to stay or leave. I talk to Mr. So-and-So. HE makes some very good points, namely that it's one thing to stick around if I'm getting something out of it, if I had some sort of mentor, or someone to show me the ropes, but I don't. I've been relying on my past experiences, and not necessary acquiring new ones. So, why stay? Especially if I know that I'll be leaving after a the MOST a year, and will I have any better chances of getting a job back home? Who knows? But if I leave now, I'm guaranteed a permanent job. It might not be the dream job I thought I was coming to here, but it's something I enjoyed doing in the past, with people who I liked (most of the time), with decent pay (comparable to what I'm making here).

By the way, sorry about that link up there. It just struck me as incredibly funny. Oh, and obviously, that isn't really him. Or me, for that matter. Heh heh.

So, then I talk to my mother. My mother doesn't like UW. She knows that they've fucked me over in the past (see posts circa January 2003), and she hasn't forgiven them. She isn't entirely convinced that this job will be permanent, she thinks it's risky.

Then, dear old Dad. I always respect my father's decisions when it comes to my career; maybe a little too much. My father thinks that running this place on my own is great experience. Even if it doesn't succeed, he thinks that I will get a reputation for being a self-starter, independent, and a go-getter type. He thinks that this reputation will following me back home when I leave. He also thinks I do have a responsibility to put in my time here. I made a committement, and I could do lots of damage if I left too soon. Hmmm..

But they all support any decision I make. Well, gee, thanks, guys.

So, I talked to them today. I told although I really want to go, there's just no way I can go right now. I told them I wouldn't leave any early than the end of June. They need to hire someone right away, though. I guess I can understand that, but if they really want me, they'll just have to wait a few months. Anyway, they have that information. I'll just have to wait and see if I hear back from them. Maybe the third time's the charm with these people..

In other news, my sister sent another one of her fabulous, random gifts. This time, it was the letters S and X. I had to check the envelope a few times to see if there was an E in there somewhere, but nope. It's supposed to be sort of like the Rx that doctors use, but I'm not sure if the people around here are smart enough to catch onto that. We'll see. I'm going to find something interesting to do with them.

Oh, one more thing... I've got a naughty confession to make. I've been reading sex blogs through the Blog Canada directory. There's a few of them I've been reading rather frequently, so I'm going to side-bar them, in case any of you are feeling a little naughty. The Sweetness Follows blog even has an audio blog. I listened to a few of them at home last night. Wow. I really do love the marvels of technology. The J-spot is also listed under the "Sex" category of Blog Canada, so I feel obliged to Sex-Up the place a little bit. I won't turn the J-spot into a sex-blog per se, but I'm going to try to include a bit more erotic content. After all, it's my job, it's what I do.